RAIN

Monday its holiday, good to sleep for long hours not in a hurray. May is the month of flowers and festivities. It is also the refreshing month because today it rains and it pours. Thanks God there is still free water from heaven, like childhood days I take a bath in the rain, the only difference I don't play I just feel the cool water and said a little prayer. Lord wash me from my sins, sounds funny but real.
Thanks for the rain
It ease my pain
Water from heaven
Makes my heart enlighten
Childhood days was fun
Adulthood is vain
But still it rains
And hope is seen
Through green leaves that sway,
Rainbow appear between the rain and king sun
What a wonderful day to cherish.

CHILDHOOD DAYS WITH MOTHER

Funny memories with mother, reminds me when I was five years old. There's a moment that I jump on the window of our "nipa hut" because she want to scold me. I respect her but I don't want to be scolded so little toughie jump. During those days my mother was giving conception to my younger sister.
Like a lion that roar she's very angry and said "don't return here because if I caught you I will bit you". So as a good follower till the day has dawn I don't return even I have empty stomach that's already complaining. The rest is history as I reminisce I was so fool then, and at young age I was so tough. I honor my mother she gave her best, there are times that she's crying in front of me. Deep in my heart I want to cry too but in front of her I tell a joke and smiled. My childhood days with "Nanay" as I called her was the best training I ever had. For me she is the best cook in the world because even the food is simple vegetable that found in our backyard it taste good. A patient wife and mother even my father was so tough she has the power to be more stronger for us to become a one solid family. "Nay" I find and met many mother but you're the best you love me but you taught me valuable things. You gave me enough discipline to conquer trials,your faith that I inherit. Thanks for everything when I'm down and hopeless thinking of you makes me awake. I love you Nay your dreams will come true you deserve a better life because your a good mother to us.

WALK WITH STRANGER

I met Alex somewhere than the road. Funny meeting arrogant Alex is stranger to me so I don't know his name. As the receptionist in the table I smile at him and said "new candidate". And what a reply "you don't know me?" with an arrogant look he said "I'm Alex Sison" then leave me with a sarcastic look. I forgot that moment, then tonight I'm looking for my peer and I don't see them and as community he's also looking for them so what next, I ride in his car and its like we're an old shoe. Funny I don't talk to stranger but this arrogant turn to be humorous, smart and a down to earth person.

The Greatest Job Offer

I came from a poor family, but when I’ll say my last name and my ancestors’ elders said I came from a rich clan. Whatever the real score is, since I was young we live in poverty, and from this stage my mind molded to think that nobody could help you but yourself. Since then I work on my own as young as seven years old I grew up working in the farm. Although my father’s prides disagree with what I’m doing I still do it because I enjoy doing it and I strive to be successful. I remember then we harvest seasonal vegetables, tomato, legumes, squash, and corn and the likes under the sun I enjoy doing it, because of this I could feel and see the bountiful blessings of God. You could smell the fresh air touch the fresh, colorful fruits and vegetable, what a wonderful day that was simple life, harmonious with nature. And when its “palay” harvest time usually September to December, here the “Hanging Amihan” hmmmmmm… with just a breath its food of the young soul I’m full. I miss those moments playing in the mountain of hay, riding in a cart pulled by carabao. Roosters serve us our alarm clock as early at the dawn we wake up said a little prayer, drink coffee made up of rice another exciting day. But challenges started to double like my age. Crops slow down because of climate change. Farming died and most of our neighbors try their luck from other country and some succeed some loss. From that moment I promised myself I won’t live my country for better or for worst. When its harvest time we pick up every grain of “palay” that was fall and leave by the farmers, every grain is gold at the mountain of hay we sort the “palay” from the empty ones. And we could collect and save one sack of “palay”. I’m thankful that I came to see the native “bayo” a process of removing the cover of palay to become rice ready to it. Even folks started to perspire a lot they still could sing, laugh and shared beautiful stories, this I learn to value my native folks that’s full of colorful tradition, stories, myths, riddles and poems. After this stage even it’s hard for me I have to leave our village to continue my study from other town. Blood and tears is the exchange of my dream, there are sleepless night only tears and sob wipe my loneliness. At fifteen years of age I learned to conquer my fear and loneliness and persevere not only for myself but also for my family. In exchange of my study I become a servant in nearby relatives. I do the washing of clothes, cleaning the house as well as the piggery, cooking, despite of all this things its not enough, I could also hear hurtful words its like in exchange of my studies is my whole life. On the later part I’m thankful for this experiences and difficult person because of them I grew better than before and strive to do my best.

When my father curse me I learned to be stronger, independent, and fearless in order to earn a living because I was stow away , live with the foreign place and faces, I work even in a small salary to earn a living. I became a nanny, saleslady, vendor, but I said to myself I don’t want to stay on this situation. I try my luck on different places I became a talent at TV shows but became tired. I question myself what really makes me happy and satisfied. This I discover serving and evangelizing people from all walks of life. But then I feel tired also and questioning if there is God and it came to a point that I don’t believe in God coz despite of all this sufferings and sacrifices I feel abandoned. But despite of my uncertainties God loves me and gave me angels who become an instrument for me to return to my faith. And now I could say I was molded and train in a farm to pick up the souls who once in their life fall down from the fit of sin. Once a broken pot, so that in my brokenness I could water the heart of those heart who feel abandoned. A salesperson to market that I a doubtful, backslider tested and proven that God is a living God, a merciful, loving Father for all of us whom He created. For you God offer you the best job suited for you grab it or else it will give it to any body. This job is a limited offer sign now or else you will miss the opportunity.



DREAM OF DOUBTING THOMAS

Once in my life I have many questions nobody could answer. It started when I was first year high school, where I received my first bible I love to read and since it’s a pocket bible I read it just like an ordinary pocketbook. Since then I question my faith and little by little I removed the traditions and rituals that we inherited from our ancestors. That’s the start of my cross.

My father taught me how to have my rosary since I was 5 years old, and every six o’clock in the afternoon I lead our family reciting the rosary and all my simple prayers came true. My father was so proud of me because at young age I already know how to recite the rosary and response to the elders every time there is communal prayer in remembrance of our dead ancestors.

I was fourth year high school then when I stop reciting the rosary. My father was so angry with me and he felt like I didn’t respect him anymore because I disobey him. He said that he inherited it from his grandmother who took care of him when his still young and now what a dismay he called me “ingrata”. Since then my father treat me coldly.

Year 2000 when my father curse me and it’s the start of my Calvary, it’s like every time there is trials and difficulties I said to myself it happened because my father curse me. For almost six months I was alive physically but spiritually dead. It happened just like a click of a seconds and our harmonious relationship became a mess.

Sept. 08, 2000 I had unforgettable dream. In front of our house there are bamboos and beneath the bamboo here comes the white dove flying and surrounding our house and as the dove flew with a glazing lights and little by little the white dove also has pale blue colors besides its feather. And as it flew it form the image of Mama Mary. Her majesty wear white and outside coat colors pale blue and as she float in the wind in front of me I said I have to ask her. But only looking at her it’s like she know what I’m thinking and waiting for me to speak up but I was mesmerized and can’t speak. She has the face of an angel but has the power to shut me. For almost 15 minutes in front of me she’s only gazing and likewise at her. People gather and pointing at her but she’s looking at me with her eyes like a fire. After that when people started to come out to see her she started to disappear. After that dream I still don’t believe I said it’s just a dream and it’s not real.

Time pass by so quickly and I join other religion till I got tired and for almost five years I have no God but myself I said all my success and failures lies within my hands.

The time I challenge God despite of being unworthy He pours his love to me nobody couldn’t explain. And because of that love saying how much He love us despite of all our sins, slowly I return in my faith not only for myself but also to proclaim to my fellow that God loves us so much. Today I return with a child’s heart. The fruit of God’s love is the service of His vineyard. Now the dream came to reality. I realized no matter unworthy we are be humble enough because God call us to be part of His Kingdom and share this love to everyone.

We are still alive proclaim that we are alive because of God's love and mercy we are here. Now what is our proper response?



HAVE A BREAK

One day I feel something going on but I don’t know where it is? Is it only at the back of my mind or what? I can’t explain. Till my feet lead me to Eucharistic Chapel as I enter the room so solemn, so peaceful that’s why some go here to rest and sleep because the ambiance is cool, there’s a league of guardians who watch them, but still there’s still a noisy voice within me. As I leave this place I sing “lead me Lord” and I find myself entering the Memorial Park as the guard look at me like saying “another homeless folks’. I don’t care what’s on your mind! This time I discover my talent to read the mind of others ha? Sometimes our enemy lies within us and even how silent the world if in our inner self there’s explosion that will burst out, you feel uncomfortable. Inside the cemetery there lies a silent tomb, some beautifully painted but there’s no life but I feel the rest. Aha! It’s the secret sanctuary maybe that’s why at the bottom the “words rest in peace” written it’s a real rest. A moment of solitude how I wish I could feel it as long as I’m in this crazy world. I read their names quite familiar and popular names but now here they are and as the years pass by they will soon be neglected. I’ve realized even how popular you lived you will forget as you passed away, but as a good fellow die for a cost that your works will remember and will become a word of mouth soon your name will vanish but the works you started remain. The wisdom of our Creator is unreachable but in this world called life be at peace with all men.

Welcome!

One day I’m looking for something and don’t know where to find it till my feet lead me to this place they called it Feast as I enter the room we’ll it’s a real Feast a happy place to be what struck me is not the beautiful music nor the place although its a part buts it’s the hug of a strangers that has big impact its like I saw Jesus on them saying “welcome my child” at first I was so aloof because I’m not used to it but believe it or not this simple thing sink on my heart and response” yes Lord I’m here a sinner want to return to your love” and from that moment on I find ways to serve God through Intercessory Ministry where I grow spiritually and start to love being part of the Christian Catholic that I leave 3 years ago and now I was back saying I’m happy serving God with you my fellow brothers and sisters. Now every time I see first timer I hug them like saying welcome back my friend. Now what are you waiting for? You are loved to share this love to everyone and be happy to be part of this happiest place on earth. It’s our home, welcome my friend :)

I saw Jesus on them saying “welcome my child”

BLESSED ARE THEY WHO PERSECUTE YOU

These words are so strange for me the first time I hear it till the time I experience it. I said how can I bless those people, they hurt me emotionally and despised me! For the endth time I experience again how to be persecuted. Telling things you are not, judging you for whom you are not. Telling you false accusations. Speaking to you like you are the dumbest animal in the world. It’s like “I can tell you all the things I want to say”. “I can do whatever I want to do because you are my slave.” Being human I have senses like them but they dumped me like a trash. They want you to do things like what they have said as exact as they want because if not you are wrong they want you to speak like what they command, to smile like what they want, to write like what they want. On my silent world I said “I’m not a robot”. What’s the use of my brain if everything was program from there likes and desire. That’s why I was designed as individual, different from others. And now you want me to be what you want your not my God, I have my own.

They are the modern “Pedis” who are greedy they want to pay for the amount of chicken but want to get a cow. And sometimes they want it to get for free but when they sold something they sold it for a higher price. What a heart of a greedy person. They don’t think that time will come and they will leave this world with empty hands.

These people are good manipulator, they could get what they want and blame you for what you have done all they said “you have done the wrong thing. “Look at me I can do all things I have a great career because I did my best hope you’ll do the same.” I said it for your own good. Sounds great but they are boasting there own self so that you look them as a model to be followed but hey! I have my own criteria to follow, don’t impose yourself on me because we are different person.

In the later part I’m thankful to these kind of people now I know what it means to “bless those who persecute you.” Because of them I learn to dream higher. I said to myself “I will not stay on this condition forever” now as I do this thing I want to quit as a slave and live a life of success I will face my fear by hook or by crook I will get it. This is the sweet revenge thank you for those who persecute these dumb sheep because you awaken the tiger in me.

Even the painful experience will turn into positive for those who persevere. Painful experience, extract the true character of a dumb sheep into strong, fighter, dreamer and achiever. Now as I end this epistle I’m looking toward the clear sky ready to write the new story of success.

The BEGGARS the PRINCESS and the KING

Once there was a beautiful kingdom in a faraway place, there live Princess Liway and King Tucay. It was an abundant and beautiful palace till it was captured by enemies and this Kingdom became a place of scarcity and sorrow.

Princess Liway was so miserable that she want to die but the good God give her wisdom and talk to her dreams. “Princess Liway wake up you’re still alive all the honors and possessions had gone but you have your life, you have complete body to get what you want go and proclaim that your alive.” From that moment on her strength regain from princess to beggar. Only to have food for her mouth she became a servant in a nearby palace, telling herself “a beggar will not chose prestigious job, any job that is honorable and will give you food grab it.” But she always tell to herself “I don’t want to stay on this condition. Till she earn money and put a little business. On her way to success she met Prince Ramoni and they lived happily ever after.

On the other hand King Tucay was was so proud, he don’t want to work. He said “I am a king and a King must be serve, or I ask help to my nearby kingdom”. Somebody give him food and money but this is not enough. There are many opportunities but he reject it. He said “I should live like a king. “ His so proud but asking food for others humiliate him. Till he become beggar and die on the street.

Friends it’s good to ask but you have your talent to prove who you are. There are many successful men that came from rags to riches. Don’t be boastful of your past, you must be excited of your future and the most important is who you are today not who you are yesterday. Because the present is important than bygone yesterday. :)