LETTER IN AN AQUARIUM GLASS

Letter in an aquarium glass

   

         On that busy day I received a text from my brother that my father is in the hospital. When I heard that news I feel weak. Seeing my father in bed of sickness. No way his the one who taught me how to be strong. But now here he is lying on bed. Yes I became stronger because of the way he nurture me but seeing him on that situation made me cry. Its not new to me because since I was young he has this illness. But now its different  his in and out of the hospital. I pray to God  to extend the life of my father. I have still dreams for him that he may  see the fruits of his labor. Not all people could  understand him  but since he is my father the blood of my blood and the flesh of my flesh I learn to understand him. He is my greatest fan and critics as well. But in all  this course he is my greatest motivator. He push me to my limits.
    When I was a child I was very shy that I hide myself  to anybody. But now I can talk to different kinds of people from all walks of life; that is because my father push me to my limits. I remember those times that we have big arguments to the point that he curse me.
    My greatest fan became my greatest enemy that time. And since he curse me I leave our house telling to myself that I won't return till I prove myself to him. That I can stand on my own and I will be successful on my own account. I will prove to him that he is wrong.
    With just a hundred pesos I try to stand on my own, telling myself that I can make it. for almost a year of leaving our home with  no news or communication with my family I cried every moment but I try to control my emotions.
    One day I dreamed I heard a voice calling my name and a shadow appeared handling me an aquarium glass with a letter inside that addresses to me. The voice told me to forgive him from all his shortcomings and use the valuable lessons that he taught me and leave the things that is not valuable. Later on I recognized  that is my father's voice.
     It is just a dream but I cried a bucket of tears till I wake up I'm still crying . My subconscious told me that even my father curse me I still love him and I can't forgive myself if something worst  happened to him. The next day I decided to return to our home and thanks God my father is alive and kicking. We are not that expressive just a look on each others eyes we can express the deepest sentiments to each other. That's why even we have no communication that time our heart speak.
     During those times I learn to forgive my father I also learn to accept him the way he is and I understand why his acting that way. I learn to understand why he push me to my limits to the point that he curse me. That is because he want me to be successful, to get out of my cocoon, stand on my own and fly high. In the end I want to thank my father. He taught me to be strong, courageous, independent and a champion.
     Like that letter inside  the aquarium glass I understand that my father's love to me is very fragile that he takes care of me not to harmed by anybody. He protect me  in the core of his heart. But like that aquarium  glass he removed the water for me not to drown and he allow it to be opened so I can explore the world.
     Let's restore, reunite and love our basic community which is our family. May the good Lord bless our family.

Letter in an aquarium glass

   
 

The Greatest Job Offer

I came from a poor family, but when I’ll say my last name and my ancestors’ elders said I came from a rich clan. Whatever the real score is, since I was young we live in poverty, and from this stage my mind molded to think that nobody could help you but yourself. Since then I work on my own as young as seven years old I grew up working in the farm. Although my father’s prides disagree with what I’m doing I still do it because I enjoy doing it and I strive to be successful. I remember then we harvest seasonal vegetables, tomato, legumes, squash, and corn and the likes under the sun I enjoy doing it, because of this I could feel and see the bountiful blessings of God. You could smell the fresh air touch the fresh, colorful fruits and vegetable, what a wonderful day that was simple life, harmonious with nature. And when its “palay” harvest time usually September to December, here the “Hanging Amihan” hmmmmmm… with just a breath its food of the young soul I’m full. I miss those moments playing in the mountain of hay, riding in a cart pulled by carabao. Roosters serve us our alarm clock as early at the dawn we wake up said a little prayer, drink coffee made up of rice another exciting day. But challenges started to double like my age. Crops slow down because of climate change. Farming died and most of our neighbors try their luck from other country and some succeed some loss. From that moment I promised myself I won’t live my country for better or for worst. When its harvest time we pick up every grain of “palay” that was fall and leave by the farmers, every grain is gold at the mountain of hay we sort the “palay” from the empty ones. And we could collect and save one sack of “palay”. I’m thankful that I came to see the native “bayo” a process of removing the cover of palay to become rice ready to it. Even folks started to perspire a lot they still could sing, laugh and shared beautiful stories, this I learn to value my native folks that’s full of colorful tradition, stories, myths, riddles and poems. After this stage even it’s hard for me I have to leave our village to continue my study from other town. Blood and tears is the exchange of my dream, there are sleepless night only tears and sob wipe my loneliness. At fifteen years of age I learned to conquer my fear and loneliness and persevere not only for myself but also for my family. In exchange of my study I become a servant in nearby relatives. I do the washing of clothes, cleaning the house as well as the piggery, cooking, despite of all this things its not enough, I could also hear hurtful words its like in exchange of my studies is my whole life. On the later part I’m thankful for this experiences and difficult person because of them I grew better than before and strive to do my best.

When my father curse me I learned to be stronger, independent, and fearless in order to earn a living because I was stow away , live with the foreign place and faces, I work even in a small salary to earn a living. I became a nanny, saleslady, vendor, but I said to myself I don’t want to stay on this situation. I try my luck on different places I became a talent at TV shows but became tired. I question myself what really makes me happy and satisfied. This I discover serving and evangelizing people from all walks of life. But then I feel tired also and questioning if there is God and it came to a point that I don’t believe in God coz despite of all this sufferings and sacrifices I feel abandoned. But despite of my uncertainties God loves me and gave me angels who become an instrument for me to return to my faith. And now I could say I was molded and train in a farm to pick up the souls who once in their life fall down from the fit of sin. Once a broken pot, so that in my brokenness I could water the heart of those heart who feel abandoned. A salesperson to market that I a doubtful, backslider tested and proven that God is a living God, a merciful, loving Father for all of us whom He created. For you God offer you the best job suited for you grab it or else it will give it to any body. This job is a limited offer sign now or else you will miss the opportunity.